Bitter Cynical Rants from One as Snarky as Waldorf and As Sexy as Statler.

Monday, January 29, 2007

Ladies and Gentleman...

It is with great pleasure that we here at VTB would like to introduce you to the newest member of our family - WEBSTER LOWENBRAU:

4lbs 4oz and the biggest lovesponge there is.

Thursday, January 25, 2007

Oh one more drink and then I'll go

so here's the deal, our original wednesday night plans bailed on us towards the later part of the afternoon. did this deter us from going out? oh no, quite the contrary. Through the trusty world of IM we quickly redesigned our evening to head down to good ole 151 with our boy CS. we hadn't been there in quite a while, and as soon as we walked in, we couldn't help but wonder why this so wonderful of dive bars and happy hours had fallen out of our favor...

After some catching up, we reaffirmed a pledge that we had made a while ago - we solemnly swore once again that we were up to no good (which last time almost got us arrested) - and then forged ahead into rowdiness, picking up strangers and old culinary school friends on the way... school night be damned.

We may be paying for it slightly today, but totally worth it as once again we feel like the double-oh-seven is our turn to burn...

Wednesday, January 24, 2007

I light a cigarette
'Cause I can't get no sleep

  • We can't decide whether its awesome or terrifying or both that when we went into our pre-work starbucks this morning we didn't have to order, but our friendly barista just handed us our grande skim misto.
  • We equally can't decide whether its awesome or terrifying (it is decidedly bank breaking)that thanks to our eating project we have hit 31 different restaurants in 23 days.
  • We are about to spend the rest of our morning here at work looking at youtube videos, and yes, thats actually part of our job not just us finding ways to waste time... we continue to be amazed that we get paid for this.
  • We FINALLY saw the departed last night. We were left wondering why even though we're insomniacs we slept on this movie for so long. We were also left wondering why the Academy slept on Leo and Jack's performances... We love Marky Mark and all, but really?

Monday, January 22, 2007

Bring your good times and your laughter too

So we here at VTB would like to extend our seriously hearty mazel tovs to the good Levine family. A few weeks ago Amy made her engagement official, and just this past weekend Dr. Ev and Lainey G also got engaged! We wish both couples nothing but nachas from here on out!

kickass, guys, kickass!!!

Friday, January 19, 2007

Hop in my chrysler its as big as a whale

anyone else find themselves at their desk drinking diet coke, eating peanut m&m's while listening to Love Shack by the B-52's on virgin radio on a friday afternoon and thinking that they feel way more like the "faded sign by the side of the road" than "glitter on the mattress"or "glitter on the highway" for that matter??

no??? just us??? oh well then...

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

Caught your hand inside the till
Slammed your fingers in the door

phew, its been busy as hell at work making updating two blogs extremely difficult. so here we are just to let you know that other things go on in our lives besides eating. (although judging by the scale in our bathroom, its clear that not much else is going on).

had an awesome saturday night, old school style, with the ranzer, cmoss, and heatha at ino and then my living room where we also ran into the AJHammer and much insanity ensued including a trip to cheesy superclub at 3am. paid for it all day sunday. we don't have as many of those nights anymore as we used to back in the rock and roll friday days and while our liver totally appreciates the breaks, sometimes we feel we need more debauchery in our lives. maybe we should phone mrs. robinson, she was the queen of our most debaucherous summer to date.

Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Nothing else compares...

so a while back we here at VTB regaled you with some tales of "You know you live in the ghetto when..." Well, this morning we were neither amused or entertained when our downstairs neighbor started blaring his reggae music so loud at 7:45 that a vase on our kitchen counter almost vibrated right onto the floor. Nor were we amused that when we climbed out of bed and down the flight of stairs in our pajamas to ask said neighbor to cease and desist that we banged on the door for a solid three minutes without a response (our theory was that short of a sonic boom, nothing we could have done would have been loud enough for him to hear). We continued to be anything but amused when we trudged back upstairs and out of sheer frustration started jumping up and down in our heaviest boots hoping to garner some attention. Alas and alack it was to no avail, in fact the throbbing bass continued straight on to when we left for work.

needless to say we are extremely crankypants this morning

Monday, January 08, 2007

Ground Control to Major Tom:

oh and one more thing...

Today is David Bowie's Birthday! The Man Who Fell To Earth turns the big 6-0 today!!! Those of us here at VTB have revered Mr. Bowie since we were precocious little snits. We have had the pleasure of seeing him live and still hold that it would have been worth every penny even if he had just stood there and spit...

those wonderful people at fuv are playing bowie all day! you can listen HERE

how do you know that you're right, if you're not nervous anymore?

phew, would say we have the monday morning blues, what with this horrible rainy weather and strange natural gas smell thats been hovering over our fine city this morning, but we appreciate the respite from thinking about food, food and more food which is what we've been doing since we've started the eating project...

we're semi-swamped at work, so in our typical lazy fashion, here's the update bullet point style:

  • The Jets break our hearts. The Giants are just downright embarassing. BUT if you have to watch both NY teams fail in one day, we suggest you do it on the UWS with Twins, boys who go by Birch, work for that woman that stupidly says EVOO all the time, or are sportswriters. Especially when they're supplying the High Def viewing option.
  • Making Birthday cupcakes for the fabulous CG can be difficult when you can't taste the end result, but otherwise rewarding
  • Going to bars at 1am near Sutton Place w/ CG, the Red Twin, and the Good Senora while thoroughly entertaining (especially when the DJ play's Tiffany) will just make you feel ancient as the next oldest person around you is 22
  • Hearing from friends who have returned briefly from living in Gay Paree for the past six months will only increase your desire to head to the continent this summer for excellent food and wine
  • Playing guitar hero with KG and Rigatoni kicks ass. Realizing that you can play guitar hero lefty really kicks ass. Using cheat codes so that the audience is all monkeys and your guy plays air guitar really, really kicks ass... now if we could just get past the easy level.
  • If you need a great wingman, we suggest Rigatoni. Twice we went out with her in the past few weeks, twice we were easily successful, and we have two real-life actual dates set up this week. seriously, who knew we were actually looking to date? apparently, we here at VTB are slowly growing up. apparently, we also can get someone's number and actually call it. apparently, we will also give our number out with having full intentions of answering when it is called, and following through by answering. we reiterate, who knew?

Friday, January 05, 2007

You must be a girl with those shoes

Chelsea, Chelsea, I can't get this damned song out of my head...

glasgow anthems at their best!!!

Wednesday, January 03, 2007

what's on your menu?

so we here at VTB think that double-oh-seven is going to be our year, if the past two weeks are any indication.. while we have once again been remiss in updating, and will get around to that soon, we'd also like you to know about our new project for the new year...

check it out here:

Soup to Nutz